How tired are you?
Are you stressed?
You’re not alone.
Hands down, the top challenges I hear as a coach are:
“I’m so tired”
“I have so much to do”
Couple that with the thought that we’re the only ones that can do it correctly or “if it’s going to get done, I’m the one that has to do it”, and you have a recipe for exhaustion, resentment, and isolation.
Enter a coach advising to add some pleasure to your day (as I did in last week’s blog) and it’s a wonder I don’t get more hate mail.
It doesn’t have to be this way.
You don’t have to go through life overwhelmed and stressed with bone-numbing fatigue.
Even though you’re a busy person.
Even though you have things to do, places to go, people to see.
I get it.
It doesn’t have to be this way.
Why should you believe me?
Because I’ve been there warriors.
I ended up in a hospital after having 32 seizures in one weekend from overwhelm, stress, and fatigue.
I know your pain and now strive to model what is possible.
A different way of living.
So let’s go.
What’s that excuse?
You say you don’t have enough time?
You say it won’t work for you?
It’s that you don’t want it bad enough.
Yes, you heard me.
You don’t want it badly enough.
Yep, get mad at me.
Big emotions fuel big change.
Tell me all the excuses you have about why you’re stressed, overwhelmed, and fatigued.
I still call BS
When you want it bad enough you stop looking for reasons why you can’t have it.
You stop listening to the excuses in your brain.
You stop looking around you to find evidence for why it won’t work for you.
Instead, you think “what if…”
You open the window of possibility.
You start looking for ways you could shift.
You look around at others who are doing it and open your mind to think: “If it’s possible for them, then maybe it’s possible for me”.
First step to feeling less overwhelm, less stress, and less debilitating fatigue?
Take responsibility for your current situation.
Yes you’re busy.
Yes you’re overwhelmed.
And no, we weren’t taught emotional intelligence in school.
Luckily we know better now.
We now know that our thoughts create our feelings.
Yes, even the feelings of overwhelm, stress, or fatigue.
We feel stress, overwhelm and fatigue because of the thoughts we’re thinking.
Before you argue with me that your situation is different, please play along.
Have you ever had someone complain to you about something that’s going on in their life that’s totally stressing them out and you think: “oh my god, if only that were my problem?!”
Ask any 16-year old what they’re stressed about and you’ll probably experience this situation.
They may be stressed because they have to go to soccer practice, finish a math homework assignment, check in with their snapchat friends, and what…now you want them to make their bed?!?
When they’re done yelling about why they can’t possibly make their bed, they may say they feel stressed, overwhelmed and fed up.
Similar to you, ey?
Yet, you look at their situation and think: “come on! You don’t pay the mortgage, you didn’t have to shop for the food you’re eating, you don’t have to think of anything but yourself…..tough life”
Yet, if you have a teen, you know, their stress is real. They’re feeling it. Big time.
What I’m pointing out is that it’s not the situation that’s causing their stress. How do we know that? Their situation wouldn’t stress you out. It wouldn’t stress me out. What’s stressing them out is their thoughts about their situation.
Same with you.
It’s not your situation that causes you to feel stressed, it’s your thoughts about the situation.
This is awesome news!
What this means is that we have control over what we feel. We have a lot more control than we thought we did when we thought our situation caused our stress. When I used to think that the length of my to-do list or my son’s attitude caused my stress, I felt out of control and my stress would feel even more crushing. Learning that it was my thoughts that cause my feelings was life-changing and freeing for me. One of the easiest ways to start lessening our stress, fatigue, and overwhelm is to pay attention to what we’re telling ourselves about our situation.
Pay attention to what you are saying to yourself.
Which thoughts you’re choosing to focus on?
I actually wish I could pay you $100 to do this because I PROMISE you’ll feel less stress, overwhelm and fatigue. Too often I tell people of this tool and they don’t use it because they think it’s too simple or won’t really make a difference.
It makes all the difference warriors!
It really can be this simple.
Start in the morning: What thoughts are you thinking about your day?
Spend 30 seconds to 3 minutes checking in with your brain and you will feel better. Ask yourself any of these questions:
What do I want my day to be like?
How do I want to feel during my day?
How do I want to show up as a woman, worker, mom, wife?
What do I want to act like?
How do I want to feel at the end of my day?
I am so passionate about helping you lessen overwhelm and stress as Ive been in both places: 110% overwhelm and fatigue to today, living a life I love.
Could you try this this week?
What do you have to lose? (besides stress, reactivity, and overwhelm?)
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If you want to feel differently you must focus on different thoughts. Why not commit to starting your day with 30-3 minutes of mindfulness?
It’s truly your choice. Email me, comment below, zing me a message. Join the Facebook group to discuss this post (and anything else on your mind). The more of us who live in a conscious intentional way, the calmer and less reactive this world will be.
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