Two Tools for a New Year

You want this year to be different, ey?
How so?
What have you done in the past when you want to make a change?
What has worked? What has not worked?

The trick is to use your knowledge of yourself to move forward. Who cares what someone else says works for them? Who cares what someone else says you should eat or exercise? What has worked for you? Dig into yourself, your actual experiences, and your knowledge of yourself. 
You don’t need to read another book, listen to another podcast, or research another plan. 

You know what you need to do. Now do it.
If you know you need to write down what you’re eating, then write down what you’re eating. 
If you know you need to be held accountable, then hire a coach. 
If you know you need to get up and exercise in the morning, then get up in the morning and exercise.
If you know you need to get to stop watching so much TV, then guess what….yep, stop watching so much TV. 

The good news is that, in reading this far, you’re already making progress by using the first tool for change: self awareness. What works for you? What doesn’t work for you? What is your brain used to doing? What do you like? What do you want? How do you want to feel?

The second tool is support. You must have people around you that lift you up. Look around: family members, your spouse, your best friends. How do you feel after being with these people? How does talking with them make you feel? If those around you are not supportive, hire a coach, find an online community, reach out to other moms. No matter how alone you feel, you never are. No matter what you are experiencing, you are not the first person to experience it. Reach out. Find your tribe. You can not, nor are you meant to, do this alone.

Just as there are two main tools for change there are two main road blocks to growth. 

1) Change is hard. It is uncomfortable. We do the same things over and over because we are familiar with the results. If we’ve had a glass of wine every night to relax us from our stressful day, when we stop having the wine, we will come face to face with what is stressful in our day. If we’ve been stuffing our feelings down with food, when we stop eating….aughl! we suddenly have to feel the feelings!? Look back to the beginning of this blog. We speak of how we know what we need to do. It’s often quite simple. If we ate only when we were hungry, would anyone have a weight issue? Why don’t we do it then? Because of road block number one: it’s hard. 

2) Change is scary. We are afraid of asking for what we want. We are afraid of what others will think. We are afraid of being judged. We keep doing the same thing over and over because we know what results we’ll get. What if we stop drinking? What if we stop complaining? What if we stop procrastinating? What if we stop being so busy? What if we start asking for what we want? What if? I’ll tell you because I’ve done it (and continue to do it). People will judge you. People will think say negative things about you. It’s okay. Their judgements and their opinions are about them and their life choices. I’ve learned to view others opinions of me as their business, not mine. What is my business? How damn good I feel when I’ve tapped into what I want. How damn freeing it is to say no to things I don’t want to do because I don’t want to do it. How empowered I feel when I stop living my life based on what someone else thinks I should be doing. 

Lean into your tools to get past the road blocks.

Learn who you are; what you like; what you’re good at.

You don’t need to change your job, your spouse, or your family. 

You need to change your thoughts. 

Choose change. 

Choose discomfort.

Choose to live a life you love.

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